Because today i'm Happy. =)

Ahhh guess wht guess wht guess wht?!!!!

I received a package from london today!
A box filled with love,memories and smiles! and surprises and sweetness!
Have not smiled or felt this happy since 2 months ago!
Happy got la, but not this happy!

You got me KOJL. =)
U caught me by surprise!
ahhh.. i just LOVEEEE receiving things by post!
they're somehow so much more meaningful. the time and effort and love put into preparing the package? something money can never buy. =)

Anyways. Something i realized and somehow just felt like 'penning' it down.
I realized one of the reasons why I dont easily open up to people.
Not just merely opening up, but more like, opening up my heart and letting someone into my life be it a very close friend or someone special.

When I do open up to someone, i tend to share alot of things that are very dear to me with them. All sorts of things. My favorite makan place, my favorite shopping/hang out place, my favorite park, my day to day happenings, my childhood memories, my favorite songs, my secret getaway, special places that i've discovered that is like, SUPER AWESOME, these places, only a few i have brought. my favorite radio station, favorite movies, etc!

so so so so so many things lah.
But what happens when they disappear from my life?
what then?

everytime i go to my favorite makan place,park,shopping place, movies,songs,radio stations, food etc, I remember these people whom i've shared it with. Each and every single one of them. Whether or not they are still in my life or not. If they are, happy memories they shall be. If they aren't, they're happy memories that ended with a twist.

Now, these places or things that i've shared mean a great lot to me. But when certain people are no longer in my life, the pain/hurt/sad memories/ etc lingers in these places or things as well. So much so, as much as i love going to these places, when i DO go back to these places, i cant help but have a walk down memory lane.

Sighs. this has happened to me so many times.
And it really is crappy when things or places that you love so much are associated with the sad memories,hurt,pain,and sadness as well. Its something like giving your favourite toy to someone. Entrusting him/her to take care and handle it with love. but in the end, when things dont turn out right, the toy is somehow, idk la damaged? that whenever u play with that toy again, u see the scars imprinted on it. Each scar, holding its very own story.

wow.
Random realization about myself. =)
One of the many reasons.
hehs. No wonder I dont easily open up to people. =)
Its no wonder.

xoxo.!