Monday, December 01, 2014

It's the last month of the Year! *gasp!*

Hello world!

So yes, it's been a while since i've given you guys a proper update about my current life. But I guess i've been too busy living to type it all down.

So nothing much has changed since my previous post.
Life is still all hectic, with all the juggling between my working life, student life and well, being a daughter, grand daughter, sister, girl friend, friend and yeah, u get the idea.

ALTHOUGH!
A few good news to share!
So yes, i am officially a Law Graduate! Woooop!!
It was great having my entire family and best friend and boyfriend and friends with me on that special day! =) It was such a lovely celebration. Did you know that at the very last second, i decided in all sillyness to dance my way on stage to get my cert instead of walking like every other normal human being? hahahahahaha. Yesssssss. I totally did so.

Don't regret it though! Received my cert in styleeeee~~~ haha. And not to mention the amount of smiles and laughter that followed as a result of my little performance. =P

Besides that! I got my second Book Prize award for my LLB Degree! =D This time, I got the highest in the Law of Succession for my class of 2014 ! =D Got a first for that Sub! *yayyyyy* And to top that!

My marks appears to be the HIGHEST IN THE WORLD for the University of London Succession exams 2014 !!!!!!

woooooop!!! Statistics showed that in Zone A ( Exam candidates sitting in the UK) 0.00 % obtained an A for Succession. and in Zone B (Exam candidates sitting elsewhere in the World) 1.0 % obtained an A for Succession. And guess who is that 1% in the world????!

:DDDDDDD Oh manssssss. Never have i imagined being the top scorer in the WORLD. This is insaneeeee. And if my memory did not fail me, a part of my answer script was used as an example in the Examiner's Report !! How cool is that?!

Oh mansss. I used to think that all these students must be really brilliant to have been taken as examples for future students to learn from. And now i've had the opportunity of being used as an example for future students! This is so exciting really! =D

Manssss. Never saw myself as being a total Nerd. But i guess i really hit the Nerd-ish end during my final year. haha. no choice okay! It was the final lap after years of effort and hard work! Wasn't going to let it all go to waste! =P

So yes! So happy that i finally got to cross out a few more items on my wishlist column on the right hand side. =) Feel so blessed every single time i get to cross out a fulfilled wish. =))

And yes, I will become a full-time student when 2015 arrives! Will be ending my contract with my current Company in December. This part-time studying and part-time working has been pretty hectic and I guess my studies need my undivided attention once the new year begins! So yeah, i'm really looking forward to becoming a full-time student once again. My final year of my student life! or rather, final 7 months of my student life! Gonna give it all i've got and hopefully, move on to being a chambee with a law firm in September next year. =)

A whole lot of bad occurrences have been a part of my October and November as well. But I am choosing to talk only about the good things, this time.

till next time!

xoxo.!

Thursday, October 09, 2014

What Does it mean to Live?

Today I was stuck in the dreadful KL morning traffic jam, struggling to keep my eyes open and then it occurred to me, “Surely there must be more to Life than this”. You wake up at 7am, get stuck in the jam for an hour and a half to get to your office job, leave work for home and get stuck in an even more terrible jam and finally voila! Your day is almost over, and the cycle repeats itself day after day.
How on earth, do people live their lives going through the same old routine for the next 30 years?!

Surely there must be more to Life than this.

I am currently studying and working a 9-5 office job. Sometimes, I feel so exhausted that I feel like I cannot go on another day, juggling everything like this. I was never really an office job, kind of person. Throughout my teenage years, i’ve always tried to avoid getting myself into an office job. I was always a hands-on person, a people person. Not a person who sits in an isolating cubicle where you sit the whole day, with your eyes glued to the laptop. I need to move around, meet people, interact and do something with meaning. Teaching seems like a lovely idea, at this very moment. But reality is often not too kind and we don’t always get to do what our hearts, desire. Not everyone gets the opportunity to do what we love, till the day we die. Why not? Well, i don’t know. Commitments to your family, maybe? Personal limitations?

But isn’t it just sad, that you spend 40 years of your life, doing something that you only do for the sake of surviving? I guess not everyone gets the luxury of Choice, huh? *thatsoundssodepressing* T_T

Surely there must be more to Life than this!

I have been blessed, very blessed indeed, to be able to experience such a “heavenly environment” (as some people say) for my first, proper, office job. There’s nothing wrong with the colleagues, the system, my boss, the CEO. Nothing! Nothing is wrong about this company. They’re all lovely and wonderful people. In fact, I think that being able to experience working with them has been such a pleasant one. Something not many people get to experience for their first office job, or in fact, maybe never. And so, I feel extremely thankful to be in the position that I currently am in.

But, *here comes the ‘but’* haha. But, i guess working in an office job is just not my cup of tea. It really isn’t. That leads me to my next, biggest worry. If an office job is not your cup of tea, how do you plan on working as a lawyer in the very, very near future? :O Sounds ridiculous, CYKM. Of course you’d have to work in an office job. In fact, your working hours would probably no longer be 9-5 and more like 8am-1am. Lol. T_T *here’s where i say “Can I just get married and not work or get married and do something that I am passionate about without worrying about money?”* =(

Sigh. Oh-Mid-Life Crisis.

So, what IS your cup of tea then?

Well, I like art. Making hand craft stuffs. I like planning events. I feel so happy and pleased whenever the event turns out as planned. I like interacting with people, meeting new people. I like dancing. I love kids. I love photography, editing pictures, lighting and all. I love designing and decorating rooms or places. & most of all, i love doing something that has meaning or a purpose behind it. (ie: not just solely to make a profit) ‘Meaning’ could be something as simple as making a kid happy, or making someone’s day. That’s what i like doing and what i want to do above all.
So, what does it mean to Live? To me, merely surviving and living are two totally different things. But many of us live our lives with the goal to survive. Yet again, many of us don’t have the luxury of simply living live, but we’re forced to make decisions and do things in order to survive. To me, to live is to do something worthwhile with my life. To do something that I like and am passionate about.

So why aren’t you doing that then? Why aren’t you Living?

Good question. Why aren’t I? Why am i following the pathway of a law student as though my Life is set to be in this framework and this framework only? Why not get out of that rigid view of how my life would or should plan out? Ever since  A-lvls, the next 6 years of my life had already been planned out.
-1 year and a Half of A-lvls
-3 years of Law School to get my LL.B
-1 year of CLP (God Willing)
-9 Months of Chambering
-Get called to the Bar (God Willing)
-Work in a Law Firm as a Practicing Lawyer

Why? Why must life be like this and like this only? Why do people follow the book of an unknown author just because “This is just how it’s supposed to be.”?

Why do people follow the saying that “Ohh, all these chivalry will only last in the first few years of your relationship. Don’t expect any of this after marriage, especially”. Sounds true, doesn’t it? But that does not necessarily mean that Your relationship WILL turn out like that just because its the norm. Why can’t you strive to be different? To be out and away from the norm? Why do we walk along this busy straight path as though we are all robots and we do not have a choice as to when we should turn right and leave the pathway, I call “ The Norm “? Our lives are free! And we were given a choice as to how to live it! So why should we lead our lives along the lines of a framework set by the world? We are individuals, are we not? And I strongly believe that every single one of us, we’re different and unique in our own special ways. So why should we live our lives with the mindset that “Okay, so this is how it started, this is what is going to happen next, and this is how I will end up.”

SAYS WHO? Says the world? Well build your own world! Because the world will build it too small!

But, i guess, then again, it is always easier said than done. We can never run away from the cold, harsh reality of needing enough money to survive.

#Money over Meaning.
*BIG Sigh*


I have no conclusion or solution as to what any of you, facing my exact same problem should do. In fact, i’m still trying to figure it all out, pondering and wondering. Where do I go from here? Only time will tell. 

xoxo.!

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Hello World!

I know, that i have been the worst blog owner in the history of time. But here i am! After two months! Stress Free *although not completely* but at least, exam stress free! Final Year took up a whole lot of me mentally,emotionally and physically. It has probably been one of the toughest academic year in my entire Life.

So here I am, still alive and kicking after 3 years of pure torture from the University of London program. And hopefully, in August, when my results are out, i would be able to say that I've finally got my LLB hons. :D

It has been such a tough one year and boy have i realized a bunch of things about this program as i struggled by, barely alive. I was so motivated during my revision and exam period to put up VLOGS about "What To Expect" when signing up for the UOL program. hahaha. No idea where that motivation has gone, though.

ANYWAYS. We shall do that another time. But basically, my life for the past few months has been pure torture. I really felt as if my life was on hold, i wasn't living.. didn't feel like it. I would wake up everyday around 7am.. or earlier sometimes.. and started studying at my little study table until it was 12.30am. The only time i had breaks, was during lunch, and dinner. Barely had time for sleep..chat.. or anything else other than studying. Never ever imagined Celine Yap, leading such a Life. I always sought after a well balanced life and even managed to catch a tv series or two a day. But not this year. This year was different. This year was stressful, because all your hard work in the past 2 years boils down to what u reap this year. What i graduate with, depended on how well i did for my final year. And I really want to graduate with a 2:1. i really do. but there came a point, where i was just so mentally and physically exhausted that i didn't care anymore what results i reaped. All i wanted was to get through this program and be done with my degree life for good. It has been such a bumpy ride.. but i really Thank God for the people that he has set around me during this difficult time. The love and care that carried me back up whenever i felt like giving up.

U know, i felt so  many emotions this time round, it seems almost impossible to list all of them down, here. It would be a never ending list. But the saddest part, was that at times, time was so precious that i had to force myself to suppress all my feelings and emotions just so that i dont waste such precious time crying or yada yada. It was so bad, i felt like a robot! But thats just what i had to do! there was no time for weeping or crying. Because time waits for no man. I even felt guilt every night going to sleep. The fear of going to sleep, because i knew that once i slept, it would be a day closer to my exams, or my next paper. It was pure mental torture, physically and emotionally as well.

Today marks a week since i've sat for my last paper.
And, i'm still trying to recover from lethargy.. from all the lack of sleep and all the backaches and sleepless nights. I've not had a proper good sleep in the past 6 months.. i've always had dreams..tiring ones..scary ones...weird ones..stressful ones.. i'm just longing and dying for a proper good nights rest. But yeah, it's been one crazy ride and all i can think about is about the people who walked me through this difficult and tough time.

My family was so supportive.
Grandma only cooked food that would be good for my health..and so, no fried or heaty food! They refrained from eating bak kut teh because of me! Because it was heaty food! haha. My dad, he allowed me to turn on the air conditioner the whole day,soemtimes,because of the crazy hot ass weather and because my room was always like some barbecue pit. Thank you for that Pa! I know how it must've made the electric bill looked. =/ My mom, well, she was being the loving mother she always is, nagging me about getting more sleep and all. Buying me snacks which i could only eat after exams. hahahaa. Her way of motivation maybe? My brother! Benroy.. he was so kind to take care of teddy and shower her even though it was my turn to shower her.

And then there's Dylan. Dylan Michael Chew Seng Yew.
The guy who stayed up with me into the late nights in the Library for months, accompanying me whilst i studied for my papers. The guy who had to deal with all my emotional turmoils every random second. The guy who drove me home from the many intensive night revision classes because i was too sick or exhausted to drive home. The guy who understood how stressful each subject was because he was simply there, every step of the way. He saw how i worked really hard, he saw how tough a subject was, he saw me have the most unproductive days sometimes. Sitting at the library from morning to night and had only accomplished so little. He was that shoulder i cried on, a few times whenever the stress overwhelmed me. He was a friend. A really good friend. He was that motivator, that person who meant it when he said " I'm here for you. " He was there, ever ready to drive all the way to my house or wherever i was just to give me a hug whenever i needed one. The guy who gave me random little surprises to cheer me up on a rainy day. He was that person who literally walked with me throughout this whole difficult process. So much so, he could feel the stress i was under as well! haha. So did benroy actually. Guess the stress was so great, it really affected the people around me as well.

And there were the ones who was that source of comfort and reminder every now and then, here and there. The ones who prayed and wished me well, the ones who gave me words of encouragement, the ones who shared their life stories with me to let me know that i wasn't alone, to let me know that they have felt whatever i was feeling and that i am not alone.

All these people, have played such a great role throughout this whole journey, that without them, i would've crumbled. Breakdown. and Gave up.And I couldn't feel more thankful, that God has watched over me and loved me so much to have blessed me with such amazing people..family and friends.. What would I have done without all of you? =')

God has been so faithful and merciful throughout these 3 tough years.
And boy am i glad to say that it is finally over!!!

I just want to Thank each and everyone one of you for being there for me in your own special ways. Just know how much i appreciate each and every act, be it big or small. It meant alot and it made a big difference. I couldn't feel more blessed. =))

I don't exactly have my summer planned out as i usually do, this year.
Goes to show how busy i've been this year. So busy living i didn't even have the time to 'pen' it down! But here i am! Haha. Ready to 'pen' them down ! Thus far, I have Sarawak in mind and maybe Singapore! =) But we'll just have to see where Life takes me! Loads to update u guys about, but this will have to do for now. Till next time! =)

xoxo.!

Wednesday, April 09, 2014

Disappointment.

How do we keep ourselves away from disappointment? Could we avoid it? Dodge it? Is it even possible?

One might think that locking up ourselves and isolating ourselves from the world would do. As long as I'm no where near nobody, I would be safe. Safe from any hurt. Safe from any possibilities of disappointment.

But then if u think about it, one can also be disappointed without even having the need for another person to do anything at all! And that's just it. You're disappointed because someone had omitted themselves from doing something u wish they would have. Like caring.. Making up for their wrongs.. And etc.

So how do we escape disappointment in life? Or is it just inevitable?

If you're hoping for some conclusion and solution at the end of this post, I might have just disappointed you, because I don't. ( ohh the ironyyyy. ) but yeah. I too am puzzled.. Walking through this maze.. Finding a way out but I just can't seem to see the light at the end of any tunnel at this point in time.

I had experienced so much disappointment in a row.. In just a day.. And I am struggling to find my route to recovery.

Where do I go from here?.

Thursday, January 09, 2014

How has it Been?

Hey world.

So, how has it been?
It's been rather difficult for me to move away from the person that i once was. From me not being able to NOT care. But i've been making an effort and it has been going alright so far.. i think..

Been meeting up with a few close friends and been feeling the immense stress of my final year under the UOL.

4 months till my first paper.

So after yesterday, i have decided to stop planning any meet ups for now.
*heh, as if tht can happen*
But i will try tho..

So yes, really soon, the commencement of my "Isolation from the World period" will take place. To be honest, i am far from ready to enter this whole time of the year all over again. =((( But i guess, time waits for no man and time is something that i cannot afford. SO, yes, will start being a completely lifeless nerd real real soon.. But in the meanwhile, i have left, a photoshoot and video shoot with my crew to look forward to and one last performance for a youth event this coming February. After tht, completely no dance till after the 10th of June. The day i finish and am done with Law School! :DD!!!

So yeah, besides tht, i've been doing alright i guess.
Been falling sick. Coz of the busy schedule and the hot hot weather.
But i've been making a real and proper effort at sleeping early and waking up early.
Been trying to spend my time more wisely and be more productive.. in studies, health, etc.

Let's just hope this would last and bear good fruit! =)

xoxo.!

Friday, January 03, 2014

An End to a New Beginning.

I have always tried to keep up with the big pool of friends that I have scattered all around. It's not easy trying to do so especially since I have the schedule of some big shot business man. No, I kid. But seriously, I'm a busy bee. A very busy one to the point of having no time for sleep!

Sleep! One of the most vital elements for a human being to function properly. 

I try and try so hard to juggle everything with my two hands to the point of being worn out, almost completely at times. 

Why do I do this to myself? 

I rather meet up with people and try to squeeze them into my busy schedule despite not having enough time for my own self. Sometimes, I set aside time with studies, dance or family or even God! To spend time with these people or at least, to keep up with them. 

Best part? Some of them never made an effort! It has always been a one way thing but yet! Because they are dear to me, I journey on, on this lonely one way street. 

But why?! Why do you do this to yourself cykm? 

Simply because, I choose to believe that they'll come through, one day. But sometimes, that day never comes, and I, being a normal human being, gets tired. Guess what happens when I stop making the initiative?

That's right. We drift apart. And sometimes, this inevitably makes me feel bad. And when I feel bad, this makes me feel obliged to approach them and to repeat this never ending cycle all over again.

Last year, sometime around December, something hit me really badly. Because I've never been more busy and I guess, time was never a luxury that I could afford. Hence, after being hurt and disappointed really badly, I've decided to just Stop. This. For. Good. 

And what better way than to start the year afresh and to start now? 

Hence, I have decided, that I will no longer spend.. Wait. Scratch that. Waste time, on people who don't deserve it, and start spending MORE time on the ones who do. I no longer want to feel bad and obliged. If we drift apart, so be it. It was never meant to be a one man conquest anyways. Even if I DO feel bad, I will refuse! to act on it. Because I guess it will take time discarding a part of me that has been as such for years. But no more. 

As I grow older, my time becomes more and more limited and I guess, enough is enough. 

I am going to start spending more time on the people who deserve it. 
I will stop! Neglecting myself. I will try my utmost best to take better care of myself. *especially since I'm known for being the worst at self care* 
And I will build stronger and healthier relationships that doesn't require me to forego what matters JUST because its a one way thing. 

It is not going to be easy for me to allow myself to see these friendships and relationships fall and crumble after many years of time and effort especially since, I am one who treasures them a lot. But I guess, sometimes, you've jst got to do what you've got to do. 

Xoxo.!

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Last day of 2013 !

It's New Year's Eve! :O

So how shall i sum up my year ?
I guess, I would say that my 2013 has been a pretty long one. It definitely didn't feel like just ONE year. But it actually felt like 3 different years.

From January to May, i was studying my ass off for my Second year of my degree. Pretty much, didn't have much of a life back then.

From June to September, I worked hard to save up for my Europe trip! And had an Amazing month just travelling and seeing more of the World, bit by bit. =)

From September to December, I resumed my life as a student and entered into my FINAL year of my degree. Can't believe that i'm already in my Final year. Gosh.. this whole process of being a student of the University of London has been pure torture. I kid you not. And i can't wait to be done with it. =/ In the process, i also turned 21 ! Also met Siti Nurhaliza, and danced for her on National Tv. :O met a few amazing friends and basically, enjoyed life.

I have also had to deal with the Hit and Run saga from May to December. A very very long 7 months. But that has almost come to a closure. I got my car fixed and i'm now just waiting to claim back my endorsement fee of rm400 because i was below the age of 21 when the accident happened and for the lost of use claim.
But otherwise, it's pretty much done! tho, this process would take at least another 6 months. So yeah. =(

So yeah! Hence, why my 2013 felt like 3 long years instead of One!
2013 has been a good year tho. It truly has been a year of blessings. =)

Leaving 2013 and entering into 2014 would definitely be one BitterSweet experience.
Because 2013 has been such a good year, but I can't wait to see what else God has in store for me. Especially since i would be graduating ( FINALLY ) in 2014 from Law School. I would be entering the next phase of my Life and i'm pretty excited to move on and forward with Life.

But at the very same time, I'm not ready to run this last mile for my Final year just yet. =(
I mean, every single time January comes, it has been a trigger to the commencement of my "Isolation from the World" period. And i don't feel ready to be in tht time of the year again.
But i guess, we're never actually ready and we just have to take in whatever Life throws at us.

It has also been a year of making and breaking Friendships, but whatever it is, I am nevertheless, THANKFUL for the life that i have lead thus far.

Shall be spending my new year's eve at my favourite place with my lil brotha. =)
Gonna lay down a mat on a patch of grass, have snacks, appreciate the beauty of nature and just talk and talk till the clock strikes 12. =)

I will try to have another post up of 2013 with some pictures next, but for now,
So Long 2013. You have been nothing but Good to me and I have become stronger despite the challenges tht have come my way. Thankful and Blessed.

Here's to a New Year!
A year of New Beginnings and a Year of Stepping out of my Comfort zones.
xoxo.!

Friday, December 13, 2013

Christmas is coming!! :D

Hello all!

I just wanted to remember however i'm feeling today because it may help future me! :D

I've been dealing with a whole lot for the pass few months.. and especially yesterday.. it was stressful beyond words. So much happened yesterday at the insurance panel workshop and i found out that this case would prolly pro-long until 2014. So whtever hopes i had of this Hit and Run saga to end by this year was all crushed and all. And i just felt extremely stressed out hearing about what would happen if this and that. Kinda rushing to get to class now so i can't type much..

I also just got my car from the workshop and today, i spent in total, RM725 on my car. Because i had to service it, change all four tires, had to change the break oil and i have still, to change the mounting which would cost me another RM300. I couldn't afford it and so I decided to fix tht another time. BUT YEAH. gosh, that is A LOT to spend in one day on my car. And i'm just a student, not working.. but yes, i manintain my own car on my own, entirely. And it's not something to complain about but i actually feel proud and independent doing so.

BUT YEAH.
gosh, need to work more part time jobs to fix up my car.

But what i really want future ME to know is that.. despite spending so much money recently, on christmas presents, on your car, on the insurance bit, MONEY CAN BE EARNED, once spent.
It's not the end of the world!

Your safety is more important.
People's happiness and Joy is something that can never be quantified.
And that whatever you experienced along the way of the money being spent, is something that you can never buy.

Celine Yap,
Don't forget how despite spending so much this month, you came home feeling happy and thankful, instead of feeling miserable and broke. You may be poor, money wise. But you are rich with BLESSINGS!

Blessings of the help you've received!
How you had someone to follow you to the panel workshop and be that shoulder to lean on when you were stressed over your head! How there was someone by your side to comfort you and walk you through these tough times. How someone would go out of their way just to help you get your car from the workshop because walking there *even though it was so nearby to your house* wasn't safe.

Remember how you received so much care and love whilst experiencing all these stress and whilst burning a hole in your pocket.

THIS, this love and care that you've experienced, and felt, is something that you can never buy. Something so precious that you would keep close to your heart for a very long time.

So in the future, if you ever experience any financial issues, or when you feel like everything in your life tht could go wrong, is going wrong, pick out all these lil things that were coupled with it, and hold on tight to them. Because these are the lil things that makes life, Beautiful.

xoxo.!

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

I need a Holiday !

Hey peeps. And just like that, it's December already!
Maaan. It's so bad that i only have time to blog every once a month these days..
So many things have been happening.. and arghhh.. it's especially annoying when the things that happens, are those that pro-long and linger.. So much so, it makes me feel as if I am not able to move on with Lifeeeee.

For example, this "Hit and Run" saga that i've not been able to leave behind me ever since the month of May! It has been 7 long months and boy am I tired, and fed up. It has been such a tiresome process, so inconvenient and just, LONG. Just yesterday, i finally had the chance to get the results on the case and by God's grace, the third party is said to be in the wrong and thus, i can now proceed with the insurance claiming and all. OR SO I THOUGHT. Apparently, i was suppose to send the car to the panel workshop 7 days after making the report. I didn't know about this.. and the police asked me to wait for them to send the third party 2 notices. If he doesn't respond, I can proceed with the results and then the insurance. So apparently, i would have to write a letter and hopefully, they would accept my reason of delay. =( Otherwise, i would have to bring this case to court and make this an individual action. And i seriously have NO TIME whatsoever, for a court case right now. Not keen on a court case. Gah. =((((

This is so tiring. It's so easy sometimes to just give up.
and let bad people like him, walk away, free.
BUT NO! People like him, needs to learn that respect, regardless of age and race, is very very important. He must also learn to admit it when he has done something wrong. Yes, i sound like a mother, talking to my four year old kid or something. But regardless of age, everyone has the right to be spoken to, with respect, and regardless of age, be humble enough to admit your wrongs and faults.

I cannot stand, people who are ever so bold to do wrong unto others but cowardly hides and runs away when he has to own up to it. I cannot stand by and watch people like this get away. And so, i will finish what i started, and i will finish it strong!

Argh. I just want and hope to finish this whole saga before the new year comes. Don't want to bring this into the new year.

There are also a load of other issues that i have had to deal with over the year, not being able to get it to come to closure as soon as i have hoped. Why? because it is the actions of these other people that can do so. And so, all i can do is wait, and follow up.. and arghhhhh it's so annoying and frustrating when things are out of your control, u want to move on, leave all of this behind, but you cannot, because of other people's inefficiency! Sighs. It's frustrating, really.

Then there's studies. Oh where do i begin? Final year has been pretty crazy. The bulk. It's just overwhelming. I had a plan. But that plan isn't working out too well. And i'm kinda freaking out because time is flying like alksdjsjfhsf FAST. And guess what? My exam timetable is out! And it's exactly 6 months till my first paper!

" AIYAH. 6 months! that's still a long way to go lah okay?! "

OR SO YOU THINK.
6 months ain't a lot for a Law student. Trust me. TRUST ME.

It really isn't.
And i feel like i'm barely on track. Well it's not too bad la. It's not like i'm totally clueless but it's just that, it is my FINAL year in Law School and after all my hard work in the other years, i need.. NEED to do even better this year to obtain the results that i WANT. To graduate with a degree that is of GOOD results. And i don't plan on getting anything lower than a second upper.

SELF IMPOSED STRESS RIGHT THERE.
yeah i know.. but sometimes, we need to do so i guess.

Ahhh there's just so many things that i want to do.. but so little time. Well isn't that always the case? Heh. And yeah.. i just feel like i really need some CHILL OUT TIME MAN.
*cry* I've been so busy, I haven't had proper time to workout on a consistent basis either. *gaaah.. sucky sucky* =(

I haven't had proper time for my dog either.
I've been a horrible owner. =(((

I haven't been able to take her out for walks, haven't had time to just play with her.. coz everytime i get home, i'll just feel so extremely exhausted, i'd shower or try to workout with whatever energy i have left and sleep. Maaaaaaaaaaaaaans. I need some recharging. Feel as though my Life is just really messy at the moment. Too many things on my mind.. don't even know how or where to place them.. or what to do with them.

Hope things will clear off ASAP.
I really need a free-er mind.

xoxo.!

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

November already?! :O

Hey guys!

It's been ages. I know. Tell me about it!
Gosh.. You know, i thought i would have more room to breathe after my party. Guess i thought wrong! I've been so overwhelmed ever since i got back from the UK ! The series of events that just keep on coming and going in a consecutive manner has been crazy!

To start,
How did my party go?


My Birthday Cake! Designed it and decorated it myself! :D
A cake of the things I Love. =D.!
Kit Kats and Oreos! 
Well, to be honest, since I was practically the only one planning my 21st Birthday party, i guess you can only imagine how stressful it was! There was soooo many things to deal with and it overwhelmed me. It did. Thank God for friends who helped tho!

Thank you all, who helped to cook some of the things on the menu! and to those who helped before, during and after the party! I couldn't have done it without my family and friends! But the whole party had went according to how i pictured it. =)) Everything was exactly like how i imagined it to be! It really felt like a celebration and there was just so much love and warmth surrounding the place! Also! thank you to those who performed! it was lovely..  Thank you for all the gifts, and for simply sharing this precious memory with me. =)) It was definitely a night to remember and a 21st Birthday Party that will be kept close to the heart and mind for a very long time.. =)

Here's some pictures of z Party! :D



 







It felt as if it was a dream. A Vintage dream that came true. ='))
Thank you all for being a part of this happy and memorable celebration!
One that was filled with laughter,singing, and dancing. =)

--------------------------------------

After my party, the load of my studies came crashing like a tsunami. Unannounced.
Job opportunities for my Dancing Life also came knocking at my door, more often than ever!
And so, I have been having a very tough time at juggling both my final year of Law School and my Dancing Life.!

I have had the opportunity, just 2 weeks ago, to dance for Dato Siti Nurhaliza on a TV show called "Akademi Fantasia"! 

Dato Siti Nurhaliza and I ! :D
I have always, always had this dream of being a back up dancer for an Artist that i look up to, on National Tv!


And this came true, this year !
After all these years of dreaming and wishing.. Hoping..
And I couldn't feel more blessed to have been given the honor of dancing back up for Siti Nurhaliza, someone i grew up watching on TV, hearing about, and listening to, on radios!
It was a great, great experience.




I have also had the opportunity to dance for a Hair Show at Sg.Wang.
And they gave me this make over for the purposes of promoting their new hair product. haha. but yeah! Dark Green and Red! Never imagined having such a colour combination before! =P


With z Crew, HyperActive Crew at z Hairshow. :D
Massive make up and hair do. haha. Yes, that is I. =P
So now you know how i look like with massive make up and curly hair. :D

Had the opportunity to perform in Time square as well, for some KPOP TV competition, which also went on TV! :D


Performing at a Youth Event.! :D

And was surprised with this pretty pretty flower after z Show! ='))

And then came the deepavali holidays! Finally had a proper Sunday, the way sundays are supposed to be! contrary to the 9-6.30pm spent in Uni, having class, on a Sunday. D:

So yeah! T'was a happy sunday! got to rest, go to church, have lunch with friends, dinner with parents. Such a nice day of rest. Really needed it!

And i've also been working part time at events as well to earn a lil extra. U see, it's quite difficult to maintain your own car when you're a full time student, with no monthly income. Hence! The dance jobs and extra part time jobs! Yes, this month is service month. Boofus is gonna be sent to z workshop and it's gonna cost a bomb. =( So many things to be changed!

but yeah, besides that, all is good. Just the typical wear and tear of things.
So yeah! Been so difficult to work, study and dance at the same time!
Sometimes, i really don't blame my mum for getting all worked up and angry for not having enough time for myself. =(
Last Night, with the Finalist of AF 2013. :D
Sucha lovely bunch of people! 
Will also be dancing for the Akademi Fantasia Finals, this Sunday, 17th of November at Stadium Negara. =D so yesh! been busy with this as well! 
And assignments are piling up..time is flying and i've yet to read so many textbooks and journals and articles. =((

I guess, it's never easy wanting to balance two completely different worlds, but it is something that i want to do and so i shouldn't be complaining! In fact, I am actually really thankful and happy for all the doors that God has been opening to me lately! I am, very very much. Couldn't feel more blessed. 

But I also feel really bad whenever I get so overwhelmed and busy to the point where I can't keep in touch with my close friends. =( I try, but its just so difficult sometimes. Because as of now, I don't even have time to have sufficient sleep. =( So yeah.. i feel really bad for taking so long to reply some of the messages they've sent me.. be it thru fb or smses. But being the person I am, I dont like to give people short, 'cin cai' replies. So whenever i read their messages, i think to myself, okay, i'll reply them later when i have time to give them a proper reply. But sometimes, that time just never comes.

I guess, time is a luxury that I cannot afford at the moment. =/
But anyways! If you're reading this! You know i'll get back to you sooner or later. You know that i really miss you guys too and that I want to tell you, in detail, about all the things that has been happening lately, but i can only do so prolly.. idk.. in december. D: My november schedule is like, maxed out!

I knowwww. so busy.
But i promise! You guys will hear from me soon!

Miss you all!
Can't wait to meet up and talk to you guys asap!

But in the mean time, please take care and be safe!
Till next time! =)
xoxo.!